Skip a shot, not so fun, and Im not talking about a shot at the bar.
I had a tough day on Friday. It actually turned tough the night before when I realized I had forgotten to take my dose of long acting insulin the morning before. My sugars were running a bit high, and some shots of short acting insulin just didn't seem to be working..... That was the moment I realized exactly what my body was missing. Sigh. It is never a good idea to skip a medication, but the medication that is used to lower your sugar level and keep your body running is forgotten; it can have some serious consequences.
so Friday morning I take some insulin and struggle to get to work on time. I go in, make myself a cup of coffee then go sit at my desk and stare at said cup of coffee.......
Every coworker that walks in the door that morning "whoa, you don't look so good." then I get nauseous and have to go sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes or so..... I come back, extremely light headed and say I need to go home, just for an hour, until my sugar level comes down. Then I get even more dizzy and go lay down in our CAD room (where we keep our charts and maps) for another 20 minutes. Double sigh, I can see this is going to be an extremely productive day at work.
Eventually I get back to the house I am house sitting at, close my eyes for a few minutes then get up and put the laundry in the dryer (cuz I ran outta time this morning) and get dizzy and sit down. Then I take some stuff down to my truck, get dizzy, sit down. Start taking some stuff out of the fridge, get dizzy, lay down. It's almost lunch time and I have not eaten anything yet today. So I make myself a bowl of cereal, sit down and look at it until it gets soggy to eat it.... I'm not feeling so well, check sugar level and take some more short acting insulin.
It's cold in the house so I'm not having much luck napping for more than 10 minutes at a time. I decide to finish loading my stuff into my truck and move shop to my house where I will be more comfortable. After many light headed spells and rests, finally I am ready. I call work to let them know I do not plan on coming back in this day. Which is frustrating, as my sugar level is better now and I still have no strength and feel like crap.
So this is what its like to take a sick day!! I much rather would be working, but sugar is having a party in my blood stream and just won't settle down!!!!!!!!
On another note I have been following a meal plan on realage.com and blood sugars have been fantastic!! Hence that's most likely why my body is being SO sensitive to these higher sugar levels!
A word of advice, never skip medication. The older you get the deeper the consequences and the tougher it is to get back on track.
Try to take care of yourself!!!! (I am doing the best I know how and it still gets away from me at times) Challenging for sure.
Showing posts with label Diabetes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Diabetes. Show all posts
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
At a loss for words about hA1c
That was a rough weekend.
Stress and diabetes do not work so well together; first having the extreme low on Saturday then getting myself all worked up about an appointment to have my blood drawn on Tuesday morning. A diabetic should have their blood drawn on a regular basis(minimum every 6 months but preferably every 3) to make sure the HA1c is within normal range. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glycated_hemoglobin
Only after living with diabetes for over 20 years; I get a little(okay a lot) of anxiety over a little needle in the(my) arm. Ive had some "bad experiences" but we wont dwell on that, at least not today. I get anxious just going into a hospital. So on Sunday, my voice decided to go out on me!!!!!!
First dealing with the low sugar, then I lose my voice for the rest of the weekend!!! I pinned it down again to the cold I had last week but after thinking about it today I realized I lost my words due to stress. Stress does strange things to a body, even more so for us who have to care for our diabetes.
So here's a deep breath, and a look forward to a calm week ahead, and the sugars are behaving better for the moment.
Oh and p.s. the blood draw went really well :)
Stress and diabetes do not work so well together; first having the extreme low on Saturday then getting myself all worked up about an appointment to have my blood drawn on Tuesday morning. A diabetic should have their blood drawn on a regular basis(minimum every 6 months but preferably every 3) to make sure the HA1c is within normal range. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glycated_hemoglobin
Only after living with diabetes for over 20 years; I get a little(okay a lot) of anxiety over a little needle in the(my) arm. Ive had some "bad experiences" but we wont dwell on that, at least not today. I get anxious just going into a hospital. So on Sunday, my voice decided to go out on me!!!!!!
First dealing with the low sugar, then I lose my voice for the rest of the weekend!!! I pinned it down again to the cold I had last week but after thinking about it today I realized I lost my words due to stress. Stress does strange things to a body, even more so for us who have to care for our diabetes.
So here's a deep breath, and a look forward to a calm week ahead, and the sugars are behaving better for the moment.
Oh and p.s. the blood draw went really well :)
Friday, January 30, 2009
Acerbic Strength
Written June 11 2007
Acerbic strength
We all have obstacles we must overcome. Mine is sugar. Sugar will try to kill me one day. It has already told me so.
Sugar talks to me. Sugar tells me all day long that it wants me. It says that it needs me. So much lust is involved that I start to hallucinate. And I am aware I am hallucinating because I know what the word crave feels like. I know how it feels to be lacking. To hanker for something you will decide in a nanosecond to surpass your judgment just to get insane relief. Aw relief. Even better. Sweet relief.
I see sugar standing there. It thought I was not noticing. So it started to shout. Then began to pout. I tried to be unaccessable. Why could sugar not do the same. It is the substance that makes my body tremble. Shall I close my eyes as I start to spasm inside of its hollow doorway. When I am in its arms it has complete power over me. Its the allergy I react to after I have already ingested it and wake up in the emergency room. Someone please oblige me in putting it into an unreachable realm!
My heart is affronted with the yearning for its fulfilling taste. The longing just to lick the smooth, gritty rainbow like substance once more. You too will want to bury your face in the navel of its syrupy goodness. But many hours go by as the sugars pour throughout my veins. Dancing and swirling inside of my body while my pancreas screams. Yelling at my kidneys to do something. Anything. It takes too long to come down after a sugar high. Would you give in to your own suicide. I do not desire to.
I claim innocence. I claim to not understand. But do I really? Do I continue to allow sugar to be my neighbor. I admit I have enabled it to hold my hand for 17 years. I ask you now if you understand. Do you understand how important it is for you to stand by me in my decision.
Will you please take this sugar down from its high shelf and occupy its attention long enough so I can kick it in the ass. Together we can create a defensive stategy. We can build a mechanism, a wall of blandness against this enemy of sweet treat threats.
Sugar I am not sorry I ruined your day. I hear your anguish. Stop shaking cute like. I am not taking you home. Pretending is only perpetuating a lie. It was once maybe all I ever knew. Sneaking in extra calories under the darkness of insufficiency and naivety. It does nothing for me now. There is no question on what I am sure of in my life. Move on over sugar you are being replaced.
I no longer lend my health to that which I wish not to be bound to. I am armed with acerbic strength. My cleverness out weighs my feeble hunger. My stamina can endure and over take this. I whisper to you, It is all in your head remember.
I give myself an autopsy of what I really need. I feel better already. Life is best without all those glittering granules anyways. These are not tears in my eyes. I know whats missing in my life. Its not dry skin and achy muscles, and toes that have no circulation. Blurry vision or numbness in the fingers. Fatigue, incessant thirst or nausea. It is sugar that aids these symptoms in happening. I know whats missing from my life. It is not sugar. Period.
Good bye feeling like crap. I have control.
Hello my name is Kate. I do not have diabetes. I live with diabetes.
Acerbic strength
We all have obstacles we must overcome. Mine is sugar. Sugar will try to kill me one day. It has already told me so.
Sugar talks to me. Sugar tells me all day long that it wants me. It says that it needs me. So much lust is involved that I start to hallucinate. And I am aware I am hallucinating because I know what the word crave feels like. I know how it feels to be lacking. To hanker for something you will decide in a nanosecond to surpass your judgment just to get insane relief. Aw relief. Even better. Sweet relief.
I see sugar standing there. It thought I was not noticing. So it started to shout. Then began to pout. I tried to be unaccessable. Why could sugar not do the same. It is the substance that makes my body tremble. Shall I close my eyes as I start to spasm inside of its hollow doorway. When I am in its arms it has complete power over me. Its the allergy I react to after I have already ingested it and wake up in the emergency room. Someone please oblige me in putting it into an unreachable realm!
My heart is affronted with the yearning for its fulfilling taste. The longing just to lick the smooth, gritty rainbow like substance once more. You too will want to bury your face in the navel of its syrupy goodness. But many hours go by as the sugars pour throughout my veins. Dancing and swirling inside of my body while my pancreas screams. Yelling at my kidneys to do something. Anything. It takes too long to come down after a sugar high. Would you give in to your own suicide. I do not desire to.
I claim innocence. I claim to not understand. But do I really? Do I continue to allow sugar to be my neighbor. I admit I have enabled it to hold my hand for 17 years. I ask you now if you understand. Do you understand how important it is for you to stand by me in my decision.
Will you please take this sugar down from its high shelf and occupy its attention long enough so I can kick it in the ass. Together we can create a defensive stategy. We can build a mechanism, a wall of blandness against this enemy of sweet treat threats.
Sugar I am not sorry I ruined your day. I hear your anguish. Stop shaking cute like. I am not taking you home. Pretending is only perpetuating a lie. It was once maybe all I ever knew. Sneaking in extra calories under the darkness of insufficiency and naivety. It does nothing for me now. There is no question on what I am sure of in my life. Move on over sugar you are being replaced.
I no longer lend my health to that which I wish not to be bound to. I am armed with acerbic strength. My cleverness out weighs my feeble hunger. My stamina can endure and over take this. I whisper to you, It is all in your head remember.
I give myself an autopsy of what I really need. I feel better already. Life is best without all those glittering granules anyways. These are not tears in my eyes. I know whats missing in my life. Its not dry skin and achy muscles, and toes that have no circulation. Blurry vision or numbness in the fingers. Fatigue, incessant thirst or nausea. It is sugar that aids these symptoms in happening. I know whats missing from my life. It is not sugar. Period.
Good bye feeling like crap. I have control.
Hello my name is Kate. I do not have diabetes. I live with diabetes.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Chapter One- The hospital
Written Dec 29 2008
Most of the diagnosing period is a blur to me. I half recall getting my first ever IV stabbed into my delicate pale arms. Zach and Chris (who are respectively near my age but have no clue what life change is really happening here) are blowing up latex rubber gloves and letting them go shoot across the room- zoooom zooom zoom. Boys. They are trying their best to cheer me up but I am limp with desolation. I have no idea what is going to happen to me. Although being in the hospital is all too clear to me at the moment.
The only thing I know about disease is that it kills people. Aren’t I too young yet to die? They tell me(as in the "doctors") that I can lead a long, healthful life just like the other "normal" people. Wait just a second here, these "doctors" are telling me I AM NORMAL, but have to take extra good care of myself to be NORMAL, because Im special. And if I dont, unmentionable things could happen to my limbs/arteries/eyes/body. Really are they trying to confuse me on purpose? Because I can tell you it is working.
One of the nurses tells me~ with a smile of all the current emotions available, that insulin is a hormone, made from pigs, diluted so the human body can process it. GROSS. Why couldnt she have lied and told me it was made from dogs, or monkeys, where is the evolutionary connection to livestock? I later learned that the protamine that is mixed with the insulin is derived out of the semen of river trout. Tell me which is the better option to biologically have fish or pig parts swimming along side to my blood cells?!
Thump, thump, thumpity thump. My heart is racing as the nurse gently approaches the side of the hospital bed and in the next not so gentle movement, rips the tape holding the IV from the crook of my elbow, so it doesnt hurt as much she tells me. Oh boy I can already tell Im starting to dislike medical personal.
Diabetes is a healthy disease. They tell me I will understand when Im older. The only thing I understand as tears well up in my seven year old eyes is that I am no longer allowed to consume sugar. I have to count out my raisins, my snacks and carrots, carrots have sugar? Pay close attention to my caloric intake, learn exactly what a carbohydrate is? Not to drink soda pop anymore..... oh gawd I am going to bawl. I am so hungry, I never feel fulfilled and Im thirsty all the time, not to mention the insane urge of having to go pee at least once every hour.
It feels like sugar is pouring throughout my veins and my body does not like all these finger pricks. And the horrifying injections, which my dad is practicing his methods of jabbing onto oranges, and my mom (my parents are divorced) is practicing her stabs onto my big brave dad.
We gather up my get well cards from my second grade class mates, who probably wonder if I will ever be coming back to class. I dread returning to school more than the horrifying injections. I am a quiet kid, and definately do not have an inkling on how to explain my current situation. Can I not just stay home and be home schooled? Go fishing with dad everyday? Or hide under my bed for the rest of my diabetic infested life?
Most of the diagnosing period is a blur to me. I half recall getting my first ever IV stabbed into my delicate pale arms. Zach and Chris (who are respectively near my age but have no clue what life change is really happening here) are blowing up latex rubber gloves and letting them go shoot across the room- zoooom zooom zoom. Boys. They are trying their best to cheer me up but I am limp with desolation. I have no idea what is going to happen to me. Although being in the hospital is all too clear to me at the moment.
The only thing I know about disease is that it kills people. Aren’t I too young yet to die? They tell me(as in the "doctors") that I can lead a long, healthful life just like the other "normal" people. Wait just a second here, these "doctors" are telling me I AM NORMAL, but have to take extra good care of myself to be NORMAL, because Im special. And if I dont, unmentionable things could happen to my limbs/arteries/eyes/body. Really are they trying to confuse me on purpose? Because I can tell you it is working.
One of the nurses tells me~ with a smile of all the current emotions available, that insulin is a hormone, made from pigs, diluted so the human body can process it. GROSS. Why couldnt she have lied and told me it was made from dogs, or monkeys, where is the evolutionary connection to livestock? I later learned that the protamine that is mixed with the insulin is derived out of the semen of river trout. Tell me which is the better option to biologically have fish or pig parts swimming along side to my blood cells?!
Thump, thump, thumpity thump. My heart is racing as the nurse gently approaches the side of the hospital bed and in the next not so gentle movement, rips the tape holding the IV from the crook of my elbow, so it doesnt hurt as much she tells me. Oh boy I can already tell Im starting to dislike medical personal.
Diabetes is a healthy disease. They tell me I will understand when Im older. The only thing I understand as tears well up in my seven year old eyes is that I am no longer allowed to consume sugar. I have to count out my raisins, my snacks and carrots, carrots have sugar? Pay close attention to my caloric intake, learn exactly what a carbohydrate is? Not to drink soda pop anymore..... oh gawd I am going to bawl. I am so hungry, I never feel fulfilled and Im thirsty all the time, not to mention the insane urge of having to go pee at least once every hour.
It feels like sugar is pouring throughout my veins and my body does not like all these finger pricks. And the horrifying injections, which my dad is practicing his methods of jabbing onto oranges, and my mom (my parents are divorced) is practicing her stabs onto my big brave dad.
We gather up my get well cards from my second grade class mates, who probably wonder if I will ever be coming back to class. I dread returning to school more than the horrifying injections. I am a quiet kid, and definately do not have an inkling on how to explain my current situation. Can I not just stay home and be home schooled? Go fishing with dad everyday? Or hide under my bed for the rest of my diabetic infested life?
Friday, January 9, 2009
Chapter Two- Adapting to change
Written Jan 9 2009
After a week of resting and weighing my intake of food it is perfectly clear I am headed back to the classroom to finish up the rest of the year. You only have one month left before its summer vacation, then we get to go on a trip to Minnesota and go to a diabetes camp! My mom tries to make this sound encouraging and fun, but I dont wanna go to a camp. I dont want to meet kids like me. I dont want anything to change. Change is difficult. Change is scary. Change is BAD.
Class turns out to not be so terrible, for the time being. On the plus side: is I get to bring snacks to class with me, however the con side: is that nobody else gets to bring snacks to class...
After a week of resting and weighing my intake of food it is perfectly clear I am headed back to the classroom to finish up the rest of the year. You only have one month left before its summer vacation, then we get to go on a trip to Minnesota and go to a diabetes camp! My mom tries to make this sound encouraging and fun, but I dont wanna go to a camp. I dont want to meet kids like me. I dont want anything to change. Change is difficult. Change is scary. Change is BAD.
Class turns out to not be so terrible, for the time being. On the plus side: is I get to bring snacks to class with me, however the con side: is that nobody else gets to bring snacks to class...
But the friends that were there for me before are even closer now. Jennifer thinks out loud on how she can become a diabetic too- so we can be diabetic together. Zach volunteers that he will take care of me for as long as we will be married. Oh yes we planned to be together forever (it only lasted until the ripe old age of um, like 8) Kim, well, having both of her parents experience the thrills and woes of diabetes, is just consistently here. At least one person my age knows I will not fall over and die before I am legal to drive.
This is the hardest summer of my life so far, I tell Jennifer and Kim. The diabetes camp was a bunch of counselors all telling me the same things over and over (okay yes some of it was important but also ssooooooo annoying) then they gave me a cup of cheerios, a banana, and orange juice in a plastic bag and told me mash it up to see what my stomach looks like after eating those things for breakfast. To which I was a brat and told them I wasnt allowed to drink orange juice anymore- so my stomach doesnt look like that! No my stomach only has 12 raisins, half a english muffin, and a MEASLY 1/2 A GLASS OF SKIM MILK IN IT!!!! I also told Kim and Jenn I didnt understand why I got into loads of trouble from my mom for that little "outburst" when I didnt want to go to the camp in the first place.
This is the hardest summer of my life so far, I tell Jennifer and Kim. The diabetes camp was a bunch of counselors all telling me the same things over and over (okay yes some of it was important but also ssooooooo annoying) then they gave me a cup of cheerios, a banana, and orange juice in a plastic bag and told me mash it up to see what my stomach looks like after eating those things for breakfast. To which I was a brat and told them I wasnt allowed to drink orange juice anymore- so my stomach doesnt look like that! No my stomach only has 12 raisins, half a english muffin, and a MEASLY 1/2 A GLASS OF SKIM MILK IN IT!!!! I also told Kim and Jenn I didnt understand why I got into loads of trouble from my mom for that little "outburst" when I didnt want to go to the camp in the first place.
Remember how I mentioned I was already a quiet kid? Well quiet doesnt begin to describe how I am with the new people that I meet now. My brain is trickling, streaming with questions. How will others react to knowing I have a disease. Will they treat me differently from the other kids my age. What will they ask me? Will I know the answers, oh god oh god oh god. I am always pondering and running through the various alterations of what my life will be like from now on, when before I didnt really take the time to think these thoughts. Of course a 7 year old shouldnt be required to have their mind brimming with these thoughts.
I cant seem to help establishing a better talent for back talking though, my emotions are running wild. I am finding my blood sugar to be the major cause. I worry that I used to be a good kid. But now (gulp) diabetes has made me a bad kid. When will my status change back to being "normal."
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